Taking A Big Step Forward

One of the issues I wanted to tackle when I left school behind was dealing with my weight. For a couple weeks Saturday Morning and I were taking SlimQuick, one of those weight loss supplements specifically geared toward to women. We had some success, but decided to enroll in Weight Watchers with mom and actually attend meetings. Four weeks in to the meetings we are all doing well. I was sitting here thinking I must be doing well because I just ate dinner and am already hungry again! That said, I am starting to feel the effects of a combined six weeks of dieting efforts. Walking around the grocery store tonight buying only things I need and things that are healthy for me felt really good, mentally and physically. Walking has gotten so much easier with only 13 pounds lost. It has made such a difference having Saturday Morning and mom to commiserate with and support each other. For them this is a hard change, but for me I feel like its overcoming an entire lifetime of habits and psychological barriers. Like yesterday, my old habits would have had me at McDonald's getting lunch when I had plenty of food at home. Fast food is pretty much my Nemesis. I was so incredibly proud of myself for not stopping. It puts me one decision closer to victory over a lifelong obstacle. Today was another victorious day, here's hoping for another one tomorrow! Every victorious day puts me one day closer....to everything!

Taking A Step Back

Taking a step back seems to be a common theme in my life recently...

In July I made the move from a company that valued my skills, offered praise all around, and gave me two raises and a promotion in just six months, to a company where I'm 1-in-a-1000 and seen merely as a replacement for the for the ineffective person who occupied the office before me. I knew that this was a step back in title and some responsibility, but the money was better and the long term opportunities are better. But I had no idea that the step back would be so painful! The girl who I replaced was basically an administrative assistant for the department. My role is supposed to be very different, except the fact that everyone treats me like I'm about as useful as she was. At the last company, I was a good two levels above where I am now...doing more than the people in those roles at the new company are doing! Besides being asked to be the stand-in receptionist, the interview scheduler, and the all-around department bitch, things are going great! Oh yeah, except the fact that there is one person who I must interact with frequently is the epitome of unprofessional when they feel in any way attacked. To the point of having screaming fits and snapping at any one who challenges them. From someone who holds a management position and wants to take on a highly interactive role with many employees, this is the exact opposite of how they should act! I even had to tell them at one point that they need to interact with me in a different manner since I didn't appreciate being made to feel stupid. It has been loads of fun...really.

In addition to work, school has also been a lot to handle. My new job involved more hours than my last job, effectively cutting into the time available for school work and leaving me even more tired than usual. When you have one thing making you miserable, that's obnoxious but bearable. But when you have two things making you miserable, you have to cut something out of your life. In this case, work puts a roof over my head, pays for my car, etc, so school was the thing to get cut. Its not that I couldn't do it, I had a 4.0 in the classes to that point. But I had no time for anything else. I realize that I do have the best mom and dad ever...but that was making me feel super guilty. I didn't have time to even clean up after my own dogs because I was so focused on, and so stressed about school. The last couple classes also made me into a raging bitch. Have you ever seen the show Bridezillas? I was like the crazy brides on that show, but worse and not even getting married! It was like flipping a switch, I would instantly become a raging bitch. I felt it happen and couldn't stop it. Poor Saturday Morning had to put up with me when this would happen. Just what I needed, something else to make me feel guilty. Not only did I not have time, I was someone horrible to be around. Worst, I was hating myself for these things which made school that much less of interest.

So I made a hard decision and dropped out of the doctoral program. I still have the opportunity to return to the program later, but for now I am taking a step back from school and taking a little more control in my life. I now have the time to do the things I want to do, and more importantly, the things I need to do. Its time to get back to time with the family, playing with the pups, getting out of the house, making more new recipes, and whatever the heck else I want to do! Like go to concerts... with two fun ones lined up in the next month my weekends just keep getting better! And I am a much happier kid. Halle-ficken-lujah! Just call me the Drop-Out! :-)

The Return of Uninteresting Girl

It's been another long while since I've posted. Life has been a hectic mess on the outside and only moderately of interest on the inside. But big changes have begun to occur and I'm back to updating the Boring Blog.

One of the biggest changes ended up not being a change at all. For a long while I thought I was going to lose Saturday Morning, but a very last minute save kept her in town. I was able to hook her up with a temp-to-hire job at my current company the day before she was supposed to head back up to Nor Cal. In the process of her potential move out, I had lined up another new roommate, Choir Girl. I had to pull out the ultimate bitch move the day before she was supposed to move-in to let her know the room was no longer available. I think what ever karma I may have gained by helping out Saturday Morning was quickly lost by screwing Choir Girl out of a place to live. It sucked, but I don't think there was another choice.

Another change was that of the Freshman, our newest roommate. She's a sweet, cute girl, who apparently thought she was moving into the dorms. She event brought her own fridge and toaster overn for her room! We told her no toasting, of any kind, in her room. Not to be mean, just to avoid burning the house down! i really need to find an electrician to come fix 10 or 15 things! Anyway, the Freshman moved in to Saturday Morning's room because we thought Saturday Morning was moving back home and the Freshman wanted the bigger room. Much to Saturday Morning's dissatisfaction, she had to pack up everything and move it to the back room. When we figured out Saturday Morning was staying, it was too late because the Freshman was already settled. Other than not really wanting to come out of her room, Freshman has been very likable so far. We even went out to Fiest Island together one night to make a bonfire with some other friends. That's more than the previous roommates!

Well less than two months in, the Freshman is now moving out. She came down to go into a nursing program and apparently didn't really do her homework. The program she was hoping to get into has a 3 year waiting period!! After finding this out she checked out programs back home and found out those only have a six-month waiting period....meaning she could be finished with that program before she even gets into the program down here! So the Freshman is calling it quits and moves out at the end of the month.

And so the search for the third roommate begins again. You'd think one of the 4 would have stuck! Some one asked me if I called Choir Girl, since we now had room...that would be like asking to get my ass chewed! No thank you. But if you know some one who needs a place.... :-)

Dr. Laura and Choices

So here's one of my major issues in my life. Okay, its obviously my biggest issue in my life, my weight. This is something I have struggled with for my entire life. I know people say that and its really an exaggeration, but for me its not. I have never been at a skinny or even healthy weight. Literally from the time I was a baby to present times, I have been fat. I think in many ways I wasn't treated as badly as some fat kids are, somehow I got lucky that way. But for what I lacked in teasing I made up with in self-disgust. As it sits now, I am at my heaviest weight ever and cannot believe I allowed it to get this far. My life is a string of excuses, laziness, and tomorrows where nothing ever really changes. Basically I am tired and getting sick because of who I am and what I look like. And I don't know how to fix it.

Sometimes, for entertainment purposes at lunch, I listen to Dr. Laura on the radio. I love listening to her bash people for their lack of common sense. Feeling self-righteous I go back to my pathetic existence like I don't face similar issues. But I do, we all do. One thing that has really struck a chord with me is her stance that being fat is a choice. I waver on this issue like a politician on a controversial issue. Is it really a choice for me to be where I am at? Or is it so in-grained in every facet of my life that actual control ceased to exist over a decade ago? I really don't feel like I have a choice, I never have felt that way.

I can't explain what it is like to live as a fat person, knowing you won't or can't be included in some of life's best moments because of your size. I often wonder what I would be like if I had ever really known a healthy lifestyle. Would I still be so shy and scared? Would I have let people hurt me with their words simply because I already felt inferior? Would I have been as lonely as I am today?

I don't know, and I think I am too afraid to find out.

Its Been A While

Oh the ups and downs of life! Since my last post it seems life has been a rollercoaster ride of emotions. The have been some big ups like accepting a new job with my mentor, getting to take nice long break from classes, and the news that I am going to be an aunt!!!! And there have been some big downs like having to say goodbye to my friends at my soon-to-be-former job, having to go back to class, and staring down the potential of losing my roommate and good friend, Saturday Morning.

Like all things these ups and downs have made me examine life and what I want from it. I don't know if things are right or wrong, but I feel like I'm right where I need to be. I know some of my choices have caused concern on those in my life, like switching jobs or purusing an ambiguous degree. Most of those concerns haven't come my way directly, which bothers me a bit, but is generally understandable. We all make our own way and not everyone can understand why or how we make those decisions. I won't know what I've done until I live to forget it, for now I don't regret where I am. With one huge, obvious exception.

Roosters and Recylcing

Ok, Oregonians are just weird. Hate me all you want, but seriously, a 9 foot tall rooster as a lawn ornament?!? I don't get the attraction. At all. And no, Amy, the rooster wasn't real!

Our trip into Oregon really began at the 7-11 just north of Keizer. On the way in my sister threw out her empty water bottle, not wanting to junk up the car. As we're walking in the clerk says something about 5 cents and, assuming she is talking to the person walking away from the register, we just ignored her. As we're paying for our new bottles of water, she proceeds to berate us for not recycling the bottle and how we just threw away 5 cents. My sister, smart as she is, fires back about the store not having a recycling receptacle and gives it right back to the clerk. We walk out of there with me laughing at the ridiculousness of it all and my sister vowing never to go in that place again. Thinking this is a one-off, my sister once again tries to dispose of an empty bottle by asking a clerk at Walgreens to throw it away for her. Since we'd bought the bottle at McDonald's, the clerk informs my sister that the bottle must be returned to McD's in order to get the 5 cent refund. After a few minutes of back and forth, the clerk still doesn't get it that we could careless about the 5 cents and just want to get rid of the damn bottle! Seriously? Can we not just throw the thing away? Again, we would have recycled if there was a specific bin for it, but of course there wasn't it! This same clerk then proceeds to give me some rant about how being married is overrated and can I tell she's divorced. Um, yeah, loud and clear! Somehow we get to talking about the ban on gay marriage in CA and how chickens have more rights than people. To get out of the conversation I say just kill the chicken and how "you can get another one for a $1.79." At which point my sisters laughs and we walk out singing sic 'em on a chicken. Let them think Californians are weird, at least we know how to recycle effectively!

BTW, there is no good reason why Taco Bell should be 50% more expensive just because you are in the backwoods of Oregon!

Home form Portland

This weekend wasn't as dreadful as it could have been. I am still saddened by the frailty of my grandparents and the constant reminders of mortality, but I am so thankful for the opportunity to see family and be able to provide any kind of help. My sister and I spent our three days in Portland doing some mundane tasks in preparation for the grandparents big move. We packed boxes, sorted through photo albums, and paved the way for the visitors who will follow. My grandma showed such strength through most of our visit, helping us divide up her possessions and taking care of papa. For a woman of 4'11", she demonstrates more strength than most people twice her size and half her age! I can only imagine how difficult it is to grow old and face situations such as this where life begins to slip away. My grandparents have been married for 66 (!!!!!!!!) years, and still share a love as sweet as newlyweds. To see how their union will one day be broken by the one vow allowed by God, is heartbreaking. If only we could all have a love like that.

It was such a joy to see them and visit for more time than we've had in years. Seeing my cousins Josh, Jenn and "baby" Sydney was so wonderful! Josh is the cousin closest to my age and has always been fun to hangout with. Seeing him as a new daddy is awesome! Jenn is a great mom and has been an amazing granddaughter to my grandparents. Sydney is as sweet as she can be with big blue eyes, a dimpled chin, and cheeks that go on for days. I can only hope that we will see them more once grandma and papa have relocated to San Diego!

Dreading the Trip

This next weekend I am flying up to Portland to visit and help out at my grandparents house. I posted an earlier entry about Family Drama, about how my grandparents are in poor health and the family is in the process of moving them down to San Diego. I am excited to see them and to spend the whole weekend with my sister and to see my new cousin Sydney Ann (born on St. Patty's Day). But I am dreading parts of the trip too.

It has been almost 2 years since I have seen my grandparents, since they came down to San Diego for my sister's wedding. At that point they were showing wear and tear, but still looked relatively ok. The whole reason we are moving them down here is that they are no longer ok. This scares me. I am afraid of what they are going to look like now, I know it will be heartbreaking. I also know that each time I see them try to do something that they can no longer do, my heart will break a little more. No one wants to face the mortality of loved ones, neither do I. When they do pass, as everyone does eventually, I hope I can remember them as the healthy and vital grandparents I knew as a kid, not the images I am faced with in the coming months. I am very grateful that my sister will be with me, she will be a great source of support. I hope this coming weekend with bring all of us closer and that my sister and I can do a lot for my grandparents while we are there.

I also know I will want to smack the crap out of my FT uncle! But that's not heartbreaking, that's heartstopping.

Complicated - Done and Done

After much back and forth, much lost sleep, and hours of agonizing, I made my decision yesterday. I'm usually the type of person who makes up her mind and runs with it. This time was so much harder, and I'm not altogether sure why. Hopefully I will still agree with my decision in the coming months. I read an article in Glamour magazine about the 10-10-10 rule for making decisions. It suggested that you should consider how a decision will affect you in 10 days, 10 months, and 10 years. I used this to make up my mind and found some merit with it, but still it didn't help crack my subconscious. And boy did my subconscious have some stuff to say! I think my poor brain was working out the issues all night Thursday night! I felt like I hadn't slept at all, but the decision was still not made. I had given a deadline of Friday, so delyaing the decision was not an option at that point! Ultimately I said I'm going to go. And then five minutes later decided to stay, doh! Either way, I am done and done!

In the process of deciding I posted a Facebook status mentioning the struggle in my head. I figured it would get response, as I left it kind of vague. Well the one person on my friends list who I really didn't want to comment, did. In a disgusting manner! I realize that we all have a different mix of friends on there, but mine happens to include coworkers and family members. You know, the kind of people who sex paraphinalia really shouldn't be discussed with? Yeah, them! So of course this guy posts something obscene...I respond to his post with a clarification that my decision was life changing and that I would appreciate it if he kept his comments PG/PG-13. Of course he had to respond in an even more gross manner. Not wanting other people to see this, I thought the only way to get rid of his comments was to delete him. Which I did. Apparently that doesn't remove their comments....so then I had to delete those as well. At that point I was so creeped out by the exchange that I felt no remorse for dropping that person. I guess he noticed I deleted him and made some status of his own about how is joke didn't go over too well....duh! I still don't feel regret, as my current facebook status says "Yeah I deleted him, I'd do it again too!" I feel for the wonderful person I know who is deeply connected to him, but people have different boundaries and tolerance levels...he crossed mine. If he had respected my response, maybe I wouldn't have deleted him.

What's funny about this, is if we were celebs or some big deal, this would totally be the start of a beef or a fued! I won't lie...that could have been fun!

Complicated: The Finale

I have been struggling with the decision created by Complicated for the last week and a half. Its a life changing decision, as it would affect at least 40 hours of my life every week. The pros and cons list have been long, the discussions have been frequent and exhaustive, and my entire thoughts have been centered on this issue for way too long! I still have yet to decide what I am going to do. And I am pretty sure I have driven most everyone I know crazy! For that I apologize, hopefully its not for not....hmmm.

Easter Recipes

For my recipes this week I took on a pressure-filled challenge! ;-) Ok, so I decided to take on the Easter ham and dessert. In looking for recipes to try, I stumbled over my mom's Martha Stewart Living mmagazines. Normally I look at those recipes as one of three things: 1) disgusting, 2) incredibly challenging, or 3)full of ridiculous ingredients. Well this time it looks like Martha actually wanted people to actually be able to make the recipes! On the menu: Pineapple-Mustard Glazed Ham and Raspberry Custard Pie. We also had AMAZING mashed potatoes a la Kelly and Justin, a yummy salad from mom and dad, and some delicious peanut sauce and veggies from my cousin Andi.

My kitchen sorcery continues!

Pineapple-Mustard Glazed Ham

• 2 medium pineapples, peeled, halved lengthwise, cored, cut crosswise into 1/4" slices (I used pineapple out of a can - much easier to prepare and equally delicious)


• 3 cups sugar


• 2 cups water


• 1/4 cup country-style mustard


• 1 smoked, bone-in ham (10 pounds) trimmed of excess skin and all but 1/4" layer of fat


• 40 whole cloves


• 1 cup dry white wine


• mustard greens, for garnish (I ended up not using these...as I am not Martha Stewart)

1. Bring pineapples, sugar, and water to a boil in a large saucepan. Reduce heat; simmer, skimming foam. Cook until pineapples are translucent and mixture has reduced to 4 cups, 60 to 80 minutes. I didn't cover the pot and the pineapples never turned trasnlucent, still tasted awesome!


2. Preheat oven to 350 degreeswith rack in the lowest position. Score ham with a sharp knife in a pattern of 1 1/4" diamonds. Press a clove into the center of each diamond. Place ham, cut side down, in a roasting pan; drizzle win over top. Coat ham with half the glaze. Cover with parchment, then foil, and bake for 1 hour. Remove from oven. I didn't have parchment, this didn't seem to be a problem.


3. Increase over temperature to 425 degrees. Uncover ham, and coat with remaining glaze. Bake uncovered, basting occasionally, until browned, 40 to 45 minutes. Transfer ham to a cutting board; let rest for at least 30 minutes before carving. Serve with pan drippings and pineapple. Garnish with mustard greens if desired.

In general this turned out amazing! Sweet, tart, tangy, and perfectly moist! Other than being time consuming, it is worth the effort. And I promise it doesn't taste like mustard, that dissipates nicely!

Raspberry Custard Pie

First you have to make the crust, or the Pate Brisee...(aka crust!)

• 1 1/4 cups all-purpose


• 1/4 teaspoon salt


• 1/2 teaspoon sugar


• 4 ounces (1 stick) cold unsalted butter, cut into small pieces


• 2 to 4 tablespoons ice water

1. Pulse flour, salt, and sugar in a food processor until combined. Add butter, and process until mixture resembles coarse meal, about 10 seconds. With the machine running, add ice water in a slow, steady stream until mixture begins to hold together


2. Shape dough into a disk, wrap in plastic, and refigerate until firm, about 1 hour.

Rasperry Custard Filling

• Pate brisee


• 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour, plus more for the surface


• 3/4 cup sugar


• 1 large egg


• 1 cup heavy cream


• 1 pound (3 1/2 cups) raspberries, plus more for garnish


• 1/4 teaspoon salt

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Roll pate brisee to 1/8" thickness on a lighly floured surface. Fit into a 9" pie dish, and trim edges, leaving a 1" overhang. Tuck so overhanging edges are flush with rim, crimp edges. Prick bottom of dough with a fork. Freeze for 15 minutes. Line dough with parchment, and fill with pie weights or dried beans. Bake until edges begin to turn gold, 25 to 30 minutes. Remove weights and parchment. Bake until crust is light gold and cooked through, 10 to 15 minutes. Let cool on a wire rack. Ok, I call bullshit on this! My crust came out overcooked, and at this point it still has to cook more for the filling! Maybe half the time would be better...And I didn't have a rolling pin or a flat surface upon which to roll out the dough...see pictures below. Can't knock me for being unimaginative!


2. Reduce oven temperature to 350 degrees. Whisk flour and 1/2 cup sugar in a medium bowl. Add egg and cream, and whisk to combine. Toss raspberries, remaining 1/4 cup sugar, and the salt in a medium bowl. Spoon berries into crust, then pour in cream mixture, filling to just below the rim. I used less raspberries, a miscommunicational incident, it still came out well, but would have been better with more berries.


3. Bake until custard is set, but still a bit wobbly in the center, about 45 minutes. Let cool in dish on a wire rack. Cover, and refrigerate for at least 2 hours (or up to 1 day). Garnish with fresh raspberries, and serve cold. So as I was typing this I realized I never saw this part about refrigerating for 2 hours before serving, Oops! It was still yummy slightly warm, but it would be stiffer if served cold.

If you want to make these items to be served at the same meal, my suggestion is to cook the pie the night before! I have only one oven and ran short of time..>

P.S. If the ham is covered, you can put the pie in at the same time! ;-)

This Week's Recipes

I think I may finally be caught up on my resolution! I made two more recipes this week just to catch up. On the docket for a dinner at my parents house, leading up to the much loved game night, was Calico Rice and Teriyaki Chicken Skewers. These both turned out really well! I am still working on my timing, getting things on the table at the same time has become a bit of a problem. In all fairness, I don't have a team of prep cooks working for me to get things done with I fail around and figure what is going on... ;-)

TERIYAKI CHICKEN
Recipe courtesy of Cooks.com

2 1/2 - 3 lbs. chicken, cut about 1/2" thick
1 c. soy sauce
4 tbsp. brown sugar
1 1/2 tsp. ground ginger
2 tsp. grated onion
1 clove garlic, crushed
18 chunks canned pineapple
18 sm. mushroom caps
2 tbsp. pineapple juice
1 tbsp. cornstarch

Cut chicken into 1" squares.
Mix together soy sauce, sherry, sugar, ginger, onion and garlic. Add meat; marinate 3 hours.

Place chicken, pineapple and mushrooms on skewers, starting and finishing with meat. Broil or grill about 4 to 5 minutes, until cooked to taste; turn once or twice to brown evenly.

Mix pineapple juice slowly into cornstarch. Add marinade; cook, stirring constantly, until sauce thickens. Serve with kabobs. Yield: enough for 6 to 8 skewers.

CALICO RICE
Recipe courtesy of allrecipes.com

1 medium green pepper, diced
1 medium yellow bell pepper, diced
1 medium sweet red pepper, diced
1 medium onion, diced
2 tablespoons butter or margarine
1 1/2 cups uncooked long grain rice
1 envelope dry onion soup mix
2 tablespoons picante sauce or salsa
1 tablespoon ground cumin
4 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 teaspoon salt
3 cups water
Sour cream
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DIRECTIONS
In a skillet or saucepan, saute peppers and onion in butter for 3 minutes. Stir in the rice, soup mix, picante or salsa, cumin, garlic, salt and water. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for 20-25 minutes or until rice is tender. Garnish with sour cream if desired.

I made a couple changes to this one...since I forgot the garlic, I used garlic salt. It turned out pretty well and wasn't overpowering. Also, I didn't use all of the cumin and onions. Those both can be a bit too much, but it was awesome with out it!

UnInteresting Girl Gets a Promotion

After several years of pining for forward motion in my career, it has finally happened! When I got laid off from my previous job, I figured I was doomed to go backwards or be stuck in the same rut for another year. Then I was offered my current role, but it was originally listed as a lower position. The step backward I had been fearing. Luckily my new manager saw some serious potential and upped the position so that it would be a step forward for me! Oh happy day! I even negotiated a raise out of it, with the idea that another increase was possible if I performed to expectations. Well, at work I perform very well! Outside of work is not up for discussion! ;-) So last week I had my 90-day review and, needless to say, it went well. So I earned that extra bump in pay, and I got a promotion! Its like I skipped the step I had been waiting years for the step where I knew I was supposed to be by now. It feels amazing...

But, I haven't closed things with the Complicated situation. I don't know what to do, and the person I would ask is the person trying to tempt me away.

New Recipes! Grasshopper Brownies and Asiago Artichoke Squares

I finally found some time to try some new recipes, and the rewards were delicious!

With my classwork and team drama filling up most of my time recently, finding the time and energy to try something new seemed even more draining. But with an evening of good food and fun games planned, I had the motivation to show off some of my developing cooking skills. I think for a while its been assumed that the only think I knew how to make were some basics like guacamole, garlic bread, and chocolate chip cookies. While I could make these items really well, the general consensus was that was all I could do. Its nice to be expanding out from that base and pulling off some more difficult recipes...especially when they come out right!

This week's recipes offered some new twists and interesting challenges. The Grasshopper brownies were to be made from scratch and include two different ganaches, chocolate and mint. The Asiago Artichoke Squares had some new ingredients met with the difficulties of inadequate appliances.

Grasshopper Brownies:
These were pretty much amazing! I didn't use any special chocolates as my Vons just didn't have it and I am admittedly cheap! I also didn't follow the time line as I just plain didn't have that much time, but the brownies still came out amazing. We ate them semi-frozen and it turned out to be a great cold treat. MorningScramble recommends a glass of milk, Saturday Morning recommends smaller pieces, and OtterPop just loved them (even though she had to take a break from her otter pop addiction ;-) ). As for me, I would totally make these again. And I can now proudly say I have made brownies from scratch, box no longer required! You can easily make this using a boxed mix, but the flavors went together really well because the chocolate ganache had the same base as the brownies.

recipe courtesy of SmittenKitchen.com

For brownie layer
1 1/2 sticks (3/4 cup) unsalted butter
10 1/2 oz fine-quality bittersweet chocolate (not extra-bitter or unsweetened and no more than 60% cacao if marked), finely chopped
1 1/2 cups packed light brown sugar
3 large eggs, lightly beaten
1 1/4 teaspoons vanilla
3/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons unsweetened Dutch-process cocoa powder
3/4 teaspoon salt

For mint ganache
1/2 cup heavy cream
10 oz fine-quality white chocolate, chopped
2 tablespoons green crème de menthe (I skipped this and found the mint flavor strong enough; compensated for the tinting with a single drop of green color)
1 teaspoon peppermint extract

For chocolate ganache
1 cup heavy cream
10 oz fine-quality bittersweet chocolate (not unsweetened), finely chopped

Make brownie layer:
Put oven rack in middle position and preheat oven to 375°F. Lightly butter a 13- by 9-inch baking pan and line with 2 crisscrossed sheets of foil, leaving a 2 inch overhang on all sides. Butter foil.

Melt butter and chocolate with brown sugar in a 3-quart heavy saucepan over moderate heat, stirring occasionally, until smooth. Remove from heat. Whisk in eggs and vanilla until combined. Whisk in flour, cocoa, and salt until just combined.

Spread batter evenly in baking pan and bake until set and a wooden pick inserted in center comes out with moist crumbs adhering, about 20 minutes. Cool completely in pan on a rack, about 1 1/2 hours.


Make mint ganache:
Bring cream to a simmer in a 2- to 3-quart saucepan and remove from heat. Pour over white chocolate in a bowl. Let stand 1 minute, then whisk until smooth. Stir in crème de menthe and extract and chill, covered, stirring occasionally, until thick, about 1 hour.


Make chocolate ganache:
Bring cream to a simmer in a 2- to 3-quart saucepan and remove from heat. Pour over bittersweet chocolate in a bowl. Let stand 1 minute, then whisk until smooth. Chill, covered, stirring occasionally, until thick, about 30 minutes.


Assemble layers:
Spread mint ganache over top of cooled brownie in a thin even layer using offset spatula, then chill until firm but still slightly sticky, about 30 minutes.


Spread chocolate ganache over mint and chill until firm, about 2 hours.

Lift dessert out of pan using foil overhang. Run a heavy knife under hot water and wipe dry, then trim edges of dessert (1/4 inch off each side). Cut dessert into squares and peel from foil.

Asiago Artichoke Squares
I know I may have lost some of you already based on the name alone, but this was worth your attention. I think the idea was to cut this into squares and eat as a casserole, but we turned it into a dip and put it on some crackers. Its similar to artichoke dip you can get at many restaurants, but a little less creamy and definitely better for you! I also ended up having to almost double the cooking time. The recommended amount of time wasn't nearly enough, the center was wiggly like jell-o when it first came out. I guess I should rename it Twice-Baked Asiago Artichoke Dip!


2 cups jarred marinated artichokes, drained
1 cup frozen spinach, chopped, thawed and squeezed (the small square package seemed to be the perfect amount. I defrosted using the microwave instructions, but only half the time)
1/2 cup onion, chopped
1 garlic clove, minced (I recommend the jarred minced garlic, all the punch, non of the work! It was less than $3 at Vons, found it in the produce section on the shelves under the produce displays).
2 tablespoons lemon juice (feeling a little dumb - totally forgot this!)
1 tablespoon fresh oregano, chopped (optional) (used the one of the spice rack, no complaints!)
4 large eggs
1/4 cup dry breadcrumbs
1/2 lb asiago cheese, grated

Directions
Preheat oven to 350°F Grease and line an 8-inch square pan with parchment paper so that the paper hangs over the sides.


In a food processor, pulse artichokes, spinach, onion, garlic and oregano, if using, until finely chopped but not puréed. Pulse in eggs, then pulse in breadcrumbs and Asiago.

Scrape mixture into prepared pan, spread to level and bake for 20 to 25 minutes until set.


Cool to room temperature before slicing into squares and store refrigerated.

Square can be served at room temperature or warmed in a 325 F for 10 minutes.

Family Drama

I hate that people have to get old and fragile. No two ways about it. All three of my living grandparents are having a bit of a tough time recently. My GR has slowed down is having a hard time walking, of which I don’t think she has admitted yet. My GF was on some sort of invisible decline…ok really, she was declining in health and no one new it because my Uncle is an F-Tard. He lives with GF and GP and never bothers to tell the family when stuff is happening. Of course he’s on the line for possible elder abuse and elder neglect, but that’s only if the family decides its bad enough to press charges. Either way, GF is losing her sight, her ability to walk, and is having issues with every day tasks. The big issue right now though, has been GP. He was recently diagnosed with colon cancer and underwent surgery to have it removed. He came through ok, even threatened to bop the nurse on the nose if she hurt him again! In GP-speak, this means he’s feeling feisty, a good sign! Please know he would never do it, but he does use that tactic to rile the dogs and small children ;-). But GP has a laundry list of ailments, and we’re all very worried about him. All three of them really. There’s talk of moving GF and GP back to San Diego and away from Uncle F-Tard, who would then either be reported or moved back to my cousin’s home town. The clan is getting together this week to talk about what needs to be done…this should be interesting, and emotional.

Recipe Update

I don’t know if this counts, but we’ll call it an intermediary attempt at BS’ing. Last weekend Saturday Morning and I tried out Chik-Fil-A for dinner. The chicken was fine, nothing spectacular, but the sweet tea….is “crack in a cup!” We’re both addicted, although thankfully we have not returned to the scene of the crime for more! Upon realizing our affinity for the southern classic, we had to try to make our own.

Now this is why I don’t know if it counts, as the recipe is ridiculously easy! Basically you boil some water, mix in some sugar, and drop in the tea bags to steep for a couple hours. When that’s done you just pour the tea syrup into a pitcher and add water to taste. Oh and throw in some ice if you like you’re sweet tea cold. That’s it. So does it count? I think I am now two or three recipes behind, so this weekend and the next will be double duty. On the docket so far are grasshopper brownies and asiage artichoke crisp. Any suggestions for more?

Oh, and tonight I made a Chipotle Cream Dip a delicious concoctions of adobo, sour cream, honey, and lime. On a burrito, it was awesome!

The Hell is Almost Over

For those of you who don’t know, I hate this class!!!!!!!!!!! I don’t think there are enough exclamation points available in the world to provide the level of exasperation I wish to express about this class! It has been seven incredibly long, tedious, horrendous weeks, and I now have only one left to go. Hopefully this week, or next, doesn’t see me driving to Arizona to smack some idiot girl for ruining my GPA. She is the epitome of why I hate team assignments. For example, its an online course, so checking in and posting comments, responses, and general electronic participation are required. She doesn’t really understand this. I would love to see what grade she gets, because I doubt it will be enough to keep her in the program! Since she doesn’t participate near enough, the team portions of the class are near unbearable. I would love nothing more than to kick her off the team and complete the rest of the assignment with my one and only other team member. He, by the way, is awesome! He ask questions, clarifies his comments, he has insight and good suggestions, and…the kicker…he actually does his work!!! OMG, I know!

Luckily, my professor actually did care and has “taken note of the situation. I hate to be the tattletale, but I needed to know whether or not I had to do her work as well as my own. The answer is yes, I do – or we do as Stevie is also responsible. I just don’t understand how you get to this point and just don’t take care of your ish! It kind of reminds me of someone I used to know. She was going to a traditional college and apparently couldn’t bother to turn things in on time. She would wait until finals week to beg for extension on two and three things in a class. Somehow the professors always let her do it, if I were them, I would have said tough luck kid! Figure it out! Its not like her life was that hard! What scares me is she has continued through the educational circuit and is now getting her PhD. This person who couldn’t be bothered to get her ish together is going to be an administrator at a school or university somewhere! I believe the correct thing to say here is…we’re all going to hell in a handbasket!

Complicated Update…

I heard through the grapevine that my prior ‘Complicated’ post ignited some curiosity. I assure you again, this has nothing to do with relationships of the romantic kind, business relationships more likely, or should I say professional. I think I’m trying to speak grown-up and simply can’t hang at the moment. So, back to ‘Complicated.’ I met with an old friend and his newer friend last week to have an exploratory discussion, a fact-finding mission if you will. It was fun to catch up and hang out, but it was also a little nerve-racking. We ended up having a nice, long conversation about status quo and where we both would like it to go. Turns out we’re looking for the same thing, for the most part. Since then we’ve had a little back and forth, fully examining the possibilities. It’s not a sure thing at this point by any means, but the view is getting clearer by the email. I am excited about the idea, but I haven’t really hammered out the details of what I want and whether this really fits in to my plans. At this point I think it will, but I will be pissing off a person or two to get there. I’m fairly certain the karmic implications are minimal, as the main person I will piss off will certainly understand my decision, even if she doesn’t like it. I also know of at least two people who’ll be a little bit jealous…not that I can blame them.
By the way, it would be nice if this was a tale of two (or three or four) lovers, but it’s so not! So completely not! So if you have a spare lover, send them my way! ;-)

So with that voodoo that they do...I've been sucked into seeing them in concert, in LA in however many days it says above. Zac Brown Band and Little Big Town! I cannot wait. LBT has the tightest harmonies I have ever heard live. And since I saw them at one of the worst venues in San Diego, the Sports Arena, that is really saying something! Maybe Club Nokia will be better....

Chocolate Peanut Squares

I have been falling a bit behind on my cooking, I blame my current class! To be short, it sucks and makes me want to do bad things! But I have been trying new things weekly and using the recipes I have already tried again. Definitely progress! So the kitchen sorcery continues with Chocolate Peanut Squares! I had tried rice krispie treats earlier in the week, so when his recipe called for more krispie crunchiness, I at least had some idea as to how to handle it! Here's the recipe...

Chocolate Peanut Squares

1/2 Cup smooth peanut butter (make sure yours wasn't recalled please!)

1/3 Cup light corn syrup

1/3 Cup of honey (honey comes out slow, just wait for it.....)

1/2 Cup cocoa powder, unsweetened

1/4 Cup light brown sugar

3 Cups of miniature marshmallows (this is less than the whole bag, so good ahead, eat a few!)

1 Teaspoon pure vanilla extract

3 Cups of crisp rice cereal (again, less than the whole box...make some regular rice krispie treats too if you like, you've already got the ingredients!)

1 Cup peanuts

Topping:

8 Ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped (or use chips, way easier!)

1 Tablespoon unsalted butter

So here's what you do....

1. Butter or lightly spray with non-stick vegetable spray, an 8x8 pan. Set aside.
2. Place the peanut butter, corn syrup, honey, cocoa powder, and light brown sugar in a large sauce pan. Place over medium high heat and bring this mixture to a boil. You need to stir this pretty consistently and watch the heat, it will burn on the bottom if you you're not careful!
3. Reduce heat to low, add the marshmallows, and stir constantly until mixture is melted and smooth. I love the way it looks when the marshmallows melt, like rocky road!
4. Remove from heat and stir in the vanilla extract, rice cereal and peanuts. Press this mixture into the prepared pan and allow to set. The best way I have found to "press into the pan" is using a greased spoon. It doesn't stick to the spoon so you can actually even out the mixture!
5. Topping: In a heatproof bowl over a saucepan of simmering water, melt the chocolate and butter. Spread over the squares and refrigerate until chocolate has set. Cut into squares with a sharp knife. So I used a glass bowl over a large sauce pan, that worked out well. The part about the sharp knife is no joke! It took some serious work to cut this stuff into squares! I had to use 3 knives before I found one that took less effort, still no easy, but better.
6. Serve cold or room temp. I had them both ways, cold is nice because the chocolate on top is less messy, and its nice to have a cool snack on a warm day!

So I had fun with this one, and I made such a mess....cocoa power, peanut butter, and rice krispies everywhere! But it turned out really well. I would make it again, but probably when I had more time. It took about 40 minutes from start to finish, with 5 minutes just to cut it up! These are good though, if you love chocolate, you'll be in heaven!

Recipe and picture courtesy of JoyofBaking.com. But really mine came out more like fancy rice krispie treats, the ones below look like there's no krispie crunchiness and way more peanuts!

Kenadie Comes Home!

Just eight short weeks ago Mackenzie popped out a litter of 11 adorable Labradoodle pups, and now my sweet pup finally gets to come home! Ok, well to her new home anyway. All adorable 10 pounds of Kenadie came home Friday night and it has been cute chaos ever since! She is a cafe-au-lait color, very fluffy with soft waves, darker ears, big brown eyes, little black nose and one very big bark! The bitch (hehe) has a ton of personality and its obvious that was not lost on Kenadie! She talks all the time, even growling back at her new big sister...who is not excited to see this fluffy furball invading her space! Bailey will take some time to get used to the new arrangement, but seems to be making progress. I even caught them sleeping on the same dog bed (I have pictorial proof!). For now its an endless cycle of spending hours outside waiting for Kenadie to potty, just to have her come inside and use the floor! I've got the puppy training pads, but so far she's 1-6 on using it. Oh well, its to be expected I guess! What was not expected was the incessant whining that happened all last night. Seriously, I think I got 5 hours of bits and pieces of sleep, including two trips outside at 3:30am and 6:45am. This is the not so fun part! But she is cute and bouncy and hard not to love... I'll post more picutres as she grows and gets into trouble, like when she was laying on top of mom's plants and eating anything she could find, that was so cute! Sorry mom.

Some Kind of Voodoo

I will just come right out and say it...the Zac Brown Band album "The Foundation" has some kind of voodoo over me. Lately my thoughts have been directly pulled from the lyrics, I am beginning to wonder of foul play. Certainly a lead singer as scruffy and unassuming as this must need subliminal messages or voodoo to have ensnared my mind so well. For example, "sic 'em on a chicken" isn't something generally found in my vocabulary, and "its not ok" to be humming songs of Jolene and cocaine. But still I find myself almost dreaming the words, wishing for a first kiss on the forth of July, hoping someday I'll have "whatever it is" to be the center of a man's world, to have my "toes in the water, ass in the sand, ...cold beer in my hand," and to have some bittersweet memory of that "highway 20 ride." I guess what it boils down to is they have "whatever it is" that makes my "heart go haywire." Really, they just have an awesome record that flows so well together that I feel like I'm living the sweet and melancholy life of a broken-hearted, yet loving southern man. Given I'm So Cal born and bred, that doesn't happen so easily.

See what I'm saying! Voodoo I tell you! But if you like real country with out the flash and bang of pop mixed in, this group straight out of the south may make you wanna "slap yo' momma," but please don't, southern ladies are sure to hit back harder than you might think!

So tell me, who's got the voodoo over you?

PS - They're not paying me for that shameless plug, but if they feel like throwing tickets my way, well I'd me much obliged! ;-)

Complicated

How quickly things get complicated! I received an email this week from an old "friend" (please don't read anything even remotely relationship or sexual into that, so not the case!). He had a potential proposition for me, if I was interested (again, non-sexual, I know how this sounds!). In a quick two-liner he said something along the lines of "I don't want to complicate matters for you, but..." And with that, my life was inescapably complicated. This could be a good thing, a very good thing if he has his way and I have mine (I swear, completely platonic discussion happening here!). But it could also lead to nothing(typical with guys, but so platonic!!). I had to laugh though, at least he labeled the complication and warned me it was coming. I knew by reading any farther in the email that complications were guaranteed...but did that stop me? Hell no! So we'll see what happens....(again platonic!!!! maybe even Socratic!)

Blue Bites!

So I am considering adding a signature dessert-ish item to my repertoire and I did try out a very quick and easy shortbread cookie recipe on Saturday night (not to be confused with Saturday Morning). It was super simple - flour, sugar, and butter. I of course wanted to make something a little more exciting so I threw in some blue food coloring to make Blue Bites! As with any shortbread, the cookie is dry and rather plain - read not at all exciting. I am thinking for next time I'll spice up the recipe with a secret ingredient (which I don't even know yet) and see what happens. I mean, it could be the next chocolate chip cookie! Right....

Fried Rice - Round 2

The first time I tried to make fried rice, I enlisted my mom's help. As some one who had cooked the dish many times, I figured she was a safe bet for the assist. Not really the case! We tried to use brown rice, which I am generally a fan of, but for some reason mom insisted we didn't need to cook it first. Bad idea!!!! I will say this, the end result tasted pretty awesome, but the crunch of undercooked rice kind of killed it for me. Sorry mom.

Round two involves me and co-chef Saturday Morning throwing stuff into a skillet with pre-cooked white rice. This attempt was far more edible! We tried to pull off the recipe listed on the Secret Recipe Blog for Benihana's fried rice, but we were missing a few items and ended up creating our own kitchen concoction. Kitchen sorcery at its best! We threw in ginger, sesame seeds, fresh garlic and garlic salt, pepper, egg, chives, soy sauce, and some left over chicken. It came out much like we had hoped. For next time, and I am sure there will be a next time, we'll try using onions and a ginger-sesame dressing to kick it up a little. Either way, we had a nice steamy dinner for pretty cheap!

Again no pictures, but that's just because I forgot! I am in search of recipes for next week. Hopefully I will have a little more time as this week's run was literally thrown together!

Baking Adventures - Lite

After a disastrous attempt at fried rice, I decided to try something new, but a little more in my control. Granny had been asking Mom for a new recipe out of the Martha Stuart Living magazine, and since I'm the one tyring new recipes...Mom felt it appropriate to pass it my way. And given that Mom is (unfortunately) the cause of the fried rice debacle, it seemed best that I take the reins on this one. So this week's adventure was Oatmeal Cookies with Dried Apricots and White Chocolate. A few things about this recipe: 1) Don't preheat the oven! Ok, yes do it, but not when it tells you to! The recipe starts with preheating, but you don't actually put it in the oven until you've set the dough in the freezer for a while. So unless you want to waste 30+ minutes of energy in the oven, just do it later! 2) The dough smells awesome, kind of like doughnuts. The cookies...well they taste nothing like doughnuts. That said, I warned you, so you won't experience the same let down we did! 3) Apparently Martha's staff doesn't understand that Step 1 should be 15 different steps! We're not all Martha's, I personally don't have six more hands coming out of my back to do everything at once like she does! Gifted or not, I bet she knows how to break down the steps better than this! Here's the recipe:

1.5 Cups all-purpose flour
1.5 Cups old-fashioned oatmeal
1/2 Teaspoon baking soda
8 Ounces (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
1/4 Cup granulated sugar
1 Teaspoon salt
1 Teaspoon pure vanilla extract
2 Large Eggs
8 Ounces white chocolate, chopped or chips
7 Ounces dried apricots, about 1.5 cups

1. Preheat the over to 350*. Mix flour, oatmeal, and baking soda in a medium bowl. Cream butter and sugars with a mixer until light and fluffy. Reduce speed to low and add salt, vanilla, and eggs, beat until well combined (about a minute). Add flour mixture gradually, beating until just combined. Stir in chocolate and apricots. Cover and refrigerate until cold, about 30 minutes. (Now you see why I said to wait!)
2. Drop heaping tablespoons of dough onto parchment-lined baking sheets, spacing 2 inches apart. Bake until cookies are golden brown around the edges but still soft in the center, about 14-16 minutes. Let cookies cool on baking sheets for two minutes, then transfer to a wire rack; let cool. Cookies will keep, covered up, for up to 1 week.

Like I said, these smelled like they were going to be great, not so much. But take that with a grain of salt as I am not all that excited about apricots or white chocolate.

Sorry no picture, but check out MarthaStewartLiving.com to find out more!

Baking Adventures

Keeping with the resolution I tried out three new recipes last weekend. On the docket for the misadventures of kitchen sorcery were Rainbow Cake, Hummus, and Irish Car Bomb Cupcakes. A random assortment I know, but novelty is not lost on me!

Rainbow Cake

Saturday Morning, my co-chef - she's much more than a sous chef - found the Rainbow Cake idea online and knew it would be a good challenge for us. It is exactly what it sounds like - a cake with rainbow colors. The actual making of the batter is simple, so simply Betty Crocker prints it on the side of her cake mix boxes! The real challenge to this "recipe" is the intricate mixing of colors.

1. Start with two boxes of white cake mix. You can make if from scratch if you wish, but this cake takes some serious time beyond the initial mixing of ingredients!
2. Pick colors for your cake. We used the basic set of four colors and mixed three more of our own. Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Purple, and Teal.
3. Separate the batter into bowls, one bowl per colors. Mix color into batter. Continue to add color until the batter looks good to you. You can do pastel colors by adding less color, or bold colors by adding extra. The neon colors look fun, but we used the basic primary set.




4. In greased pan or dish (cupakes work too!) pour colors in layers. The colors will not mix or run, just trust me on this! Keep in mind what colors will be next to each other and know that the cake will rise!!!!




5. Cook and cool as directed on the box.
6. Frosting! - we used the Funfetti frosting for an extra punch, but any kind of icing will work. This really depends on your preferred tastes.

The cupcakes are super fun! The cake looks awesome! But here is where we ran into a bit of trouble... I had planned to take the cake to a Super Bowl party, but ended up taking the Irish Car Bomb Cupcakes instead. But I failed to tell my roommate that. I put the cake in the oven to keep it away from the dog and keep it fresh. Since I didn't warn her, Saturday Morning got quite a suprise when she preheated the oven to make dinner!!! Moral of the story - put a post-it on the oven when you use it for storage!


Hummus


For a healthier turn, I took up the task of hummus. Recently I have found some awesome hummus at the deli close to my work. I realize that those words are a rarity in the combination, as my brother was quick to point out! But when you find something good, you tend to want more of it. Instead of constantly paying for it a la carte, I figured it was worth a shot to try and make some of my own. The first challenge was finding the tahini. At this point, you are likely saying "tahini? what the heck is that?" much as I did when I was reading the recipe. Apparently tahini is a sesame past, much like a really runny peanut butter. I had to look in several stores before I found it in the "nut butter" section at Henry's. To my shock, it was $8 bucks for the stuff, but you get a big can that will last for many batches of hummus! Here's the ingredients and recipe:

• 1 16oz can of chickpeas or garbanzo beans.
• 1/4 cup liquid from can of chickpeas/garbanzo beans.
• 3-5 tablespoons lemon juice (not lime - trust me on this).
• 1 1/2 tablespoons tahini
• 2 cloves garlic, crushed
• 1/2 teaspoon of salt
• 2 tablespoons of olive oil

1. First open the can of chickpeas or garbanzo beans ;-)
2. Drain the chickpeas or garbanzo beans into a cup, you will need part of the liquid later.
3. Combine the remaining ingredients in a blender or food processor. Add 1/4 cup of th liquid from the chickpeas or garbanzo beans.
4. Blend for 3-5 minutes on low until thoroughly mixed and smooth.
5. Place in serving bowl and create a shallow well in the center of the hummus. Add a small amount of olive oil in the well. Garnish with parsley.

I also found that adding a sprinkling of paprika on top adds to the flavor. Hummus is great with crackers and pita bread. So yummy!

And for the finale...

Irish Car Bomb Cupcakes

It is the best of both worlds - alcohol and sweets! And its not even enough to give you a hangover or sugar crash! I got the idea from Aggie a couple months back. Admittedly, it sounds crazy at first, I mean Guiness in a cupcake?!? The crazy thing is it tastes so close to the actual drink. I love it!

Cake

• 1 Cup Guiness
• 1 Stick, plus one tablespoon of unsalted butter
• 3/4 Cup unsweetened cocoa
• 2 Cups dark brown sugar
• 3/4 Cup sour cream
• 2 Eggs
• 1 Tablespoon vanilla extract
• 2 Cups flour
• 2 1/2 Teaspoons baking soda

1. Preheat oven to 350. Butter a muffin tin or put in the muffin wrappers.
2. Combine the Guiness and the butter, chopped into 1-inch chunks, in a large sauce pan, and heat to melt the better.
3. Remove from heat, and whisk in the cocoa and sugar.
4. In a bowl, whisk the sour cream with the eggs and vanilla, then add to the beer mixture.
5. Sift together the flour and baking soda, and fold into the batter.
6. Pour inti the muffin molds and bake for 25 minutes, or until inserted cake tester comes out clean. Let stand for 10 minutes, remove from muffin tin, and cool completely on rack.

Frosting

• 6 Cups of confectioners sugar
• 3 Sticks of butter
• 1/2 Cup of Bailey's Irish Cream
• 1 Tablespoon of vanilla

1. Combine butter, Bailey's, and vanilla - beat with a mixer on medium.
2. Slowly add the confectioners sugar, beat until smooth.
3. Frost when cupcakes are completely cool.
4. Enjoy!
   

I think that was enough for one weekend! Now to figure out what is on tap for the next recipe!

Lonely in Scottsdale - Ready to Go Home

The thing with traveling is it gives you a new perspective. I've gained many perspectives in my on-campus class this week, but I am talking about the actual act of living/residing in a different place. On my previous trip, the week in Florida, I stayed with Mommy and felt at home right away. Here in Arizona, I stayed at a beautiful hotel. Accordingly, I was largely on my own, without the creatures or comforts of home. Really, simply, its just plain lonely! I was thinking I could never just up and move somewhere alone, especially without my dog! I am a person who loves my alone time, sometimes more than my time with other people. But being alone every night is not something I like. That said, I am happy to be heading home today to people I know, places I know and reside, my dog and cute puppies, places with a fridge I can use to store something bigger than a coke, places where I don't have to hide my valuables, my own bathroom, my own closet - without the suitcase in it, my own sofa and most importantly, my own bed! Now if I could just eliminate the 6 hour drive between here and there....I would be a happy kid!

The last day of class has been largely uneventful. We have all settled down, we're all close to exhaustion, and we all finally know what we're talking about. For the first time in the entire 5 day class we met with people from our specific program. I was pleased with my group, these are all people I have worked well with or would have liked to work with. I guess I identified with these guys, which should be a good indicator of our commonalities. My group consisted of the Canuck, Father, and a Foreigner. I was the youngest and indisputably the most female, okay the only female. But it was nice to finally see who's with who, or more appropriately, who's doing what. Thankfully, Hallelujah and Rico Suave were no where near my group!

We are now doing our final wrap up and getting ready to take pictures. In less than two hours, my first residency will be complete. I have to say, I think I am better for it! We have joked all along that this is just a different form of therapy, and in many ways, it has been. We've found other people with similar struggles, talked about our future fears, and figured out some nagging concepts. That's therapy is it not? So again, I am better for it and now I'm ready to begin the next steps.

Okay, you can puke now.... :-0 = {
;-)

Really?!? Like Really.....? Day 4 of Class

So this deep relaxation thing isn't all that bad. I enjoy it for the most part, I just have to make sure I don't fall asleep and start snoring in class! If you have ever been hypnotized, the process is similar. So I do it and don't mind the break, then we go about our day. If only today could have been the same! In this case, I will readily admit to having a closed mind. Religion and belief in god is highly personal, and for the most part, should be kept out of the classroom. But once again, Hallelujah has found a way to annoy the crap out of me! And several others. Nevermind that her annoyance was unintentional, I have been offended and violated! I am disgusted! Okay, not really. I simply did not enjoy having religion forced upon me, especially not on top of a task that I am already not terribly excited about! Hallelujah, in true Hallelujah-fashion, insisted on playing her "calming and meditative" track/recording during our daily deep relaxation. A little jazz music is nothing to complain about, but the speaking or voice recording over the music was a little much. The entire time it was her voice talking about god and letting him relax you and being one with god and on and on and on! (Now if you're on this level with your god, you may sincerely enjoy this - and good for you, but that's not me). At least five minutes of this! Probably closer to 8. Now my philosophies of god aside, I am not fond of preaching. And the idea that I am supposed to relax and take in this forced preaching is paradoxical for me! As I said, I just did not and could not appreciate her need to force this on us as a diverse class of students. At least 5 out of the 15 students were isolated from this activity due to either our disgust or our opposing beliefs. For example, we have an admitted atheist in the class. You can't tell me she wasn't offended by this activity! At this point, the only course of action is to ignore the behavior. However, if it happens again, opposing voices will be heard!

I have noticed the inordinate amount of time spent on this woman, I honestly can't wait to be done with her! But I will miss the classes and the face-to-face interaction. The coursework has been fun in many ways, but I can't help imagining how much more productive this time could have been. Oh well! Besides the time's not over yet....

Beginnning to Make Sense - Day 3 in Class

Somethings are really starting to come together in terms of educational concepts. Its nice to have a few ah-ha moments about things that have been covered in previous classes that now finally make sense, such as synthesis! However, there are still many things I still hear and say "Huh?"

I had one of those moments about Professor today. She is apparently nuts! We do a "weather report" every morning where we say how the weather is in our heads/lives for that day. I generally make some smart ass remark about how its always sunny in San Diego. :-) So we go around the room and basically state our mood via weather terminology. Today I said morning fog, clearing to a sunny day, aka June Gloom. This takes places, of course, after our morning relaxation and meditation... Well after mentioning her weather, sunny, she mentioned her favorite type of clouds, cirrus, and that she loves rainbows, and somehow we got to her saying she loves balloons. And not only does she love them, she goes home and blows some up to play with every night! At first I figured she had to be kidding, I mean a Ph.D. with a balloon fetish?!? Well worse things are true, so I figure she can't be that far off! But how do you react to that?!? Well, Super-Gay Straight Guy (SGSG) summed it up nicely, he said "I don't think that's something you should tell people!" I agree! And now I'm a little weirded out...

BTW SGSG is ricking his third pair of glasses today. Apparently glasses are his favorite accessory. I am beginning to wonder how many pairs he has. I mean, is it like underwear with the dates on them? These are his Saturday glasses, tomorrow he'll rock his Sunday glasses.... :-D

Oh lord, help me! Hallelujah decided to switch up her seat today and guess where she decided to plant her bum. Yeah, uh-huh, god help me, she sat right next to me! Oh my, this is going to be a long day!

Okay, one more note for today. If someone could please explain the term "situatedness" to me, that would be great!

Stuck in Class - Day 2

Oh the joys of on-campus learning...I just love sitting in a classroom for 8 hours a day! No wonder I am in an online program! Here's the latest from Day 2:

I can already tell, Hallelujah is going to be a pain in the ass, specifically in mine! In the course of an in-class assignment, I was paired up with my favorite person, lord help me! Our purpose was to read and criticize each other's work. For some one so intent on being heard, she sure didn't have much to say in her assignment! She definitely took the easy way out on this one! As I was delivering my criticism, she was within 18 inches of my face, staring, unblinkingly, into my eyes. Talk about eye-contact overload! When it was her turn to do the same, she had to preach to me about the assignment and how wonderful my work was (thanks, but yuck!). And within a minute she was already preaching to me about how amazing learning is (she's a teacher, she can't help it) and how smart her grandson is and blah blah blah. I definitely stopped listening somewhere around "learning is amazing." I really couldn't get away fast enough, but of course she had to take my hand (in both of hers) and bless me. Heavenly father I have sinned! Forgive my bias, but this just ain't my thing!

As part of the same assignment, I got to work with one of the Foreigners. That was at least a pleasant experience! We were able to work easily and effectively and even achieved the goal of combining, or "synthesizing," our ideas. I really can't say what I got out of working with Hallelujah! What I did get from her later was a bit of "social education." Apparently she just wasn't receiving enough attention from her peers...and was receiving too much attention from the Professor! Since these two have serious personality clashing issues, their interactions have gone from bad to worse to downright painful! Well, Hallelujah is done! Lord help her she is through! She managed to convince herself and others (of her own color) that Professor is racist! OMG is that a reach! I can understand where she is coming from, yes, she is being singled out, but she is the one doing it! Professor has treated the class fairly, griping and snapping at almost every student so far. Hallelujah, however, cannot handle the directions, or lack there of, and keeps making scenes about her discomfort. Seriously, I am sorry that you can't handle a situation without traditional boundaries, but really, playing the racism card? Almost half of our class is of color and no one else is feeling it, or seeing it. When you think every one else is wrong, well then its time to look at yourself and see where the problem really lies. The scary/sad/disturbing part is that Hallelujah is a teacher and/or school administrator! I would flip a lid if my kid came home with the stuff she is spewing. No don't get me wrong, Hallelujah is a wonderful and kind person, she just doesn't get it!

Saturday Morning - this is one is for you! Rico Suave shares your favorite saying, "that's what she said." He's only about 50 and sitting in a doctoral class, and he pops that out of his mouth?!?!? OMG. He just 10x more obnoxious! But at least the class is catching on to his BS! Thank goodness for small miracles!

Please note, I am learning and progressing as a student. I just find time to make some fun observations along the way ;-)

Boring Girl (Actually) Goes to School

This week, this boring girl is spending her time "enjoying" the company of her fellow doctoral candidates. Once a year my program requires an in-person class, where we come in from all parts of the country (and beyond) to sit face-to-face and converse. Looking forward to this week, I wondered what my fellow students would look like, act like, and offer in a new environment. Would the obnoxious members of my team be equally obnoxious in person? Would their online personalities begin to make sense in actual conversations? Well I may never know! Unfortunately, the "children" on my most recent team are not in my class this session. Okay, maybe I should say fortunately, because they were fully annoying and bickered constantly! I do, however, have a whole new group of people to observe and "enjoy."

Over the course of the first day, I watched my classmates develop in to separate and significant "characters." The interactions of these characters takes on a whole new level of comedy, and frustration, especially when you consider the context of a class of doctoral candidates! Think The Office with less time to develop and more time spent annoying each other! If you thought the Hillary Swank debate was ridiculous, try having that arguing four or five times per day! Except the topics here are far less interesting, such as what is scholarly writing or how do you define reality or what are your preconceptual distortions, and asking each other "reflective" questions (where someone asks you a question that you're not even supposed to answer, just to consider and reflect on in your own thoughts). So with all of this in mind, here are some of the characters...

The most immediate "character" I discovered was Hallelujah. Oh lordy! Yes, ma'am! That's right! Amen sister! Oh Hallelujah is our touchy-feely, super-intense, slow as syrup, loud-mouth, with nothing really to say! Oh but does she talk... The comedy here is that our professor is short, to the point, and blunt to the point of being rude. These two together is all fireworks, with a little fire and brimstone! Lord save us from Hallelujah!

Nest obvious character has to be Rico Suave... he is a school teacher, who walked in late and unprepared. He's got his shirt unbuttoned to show a little skin and, of course, his gold chain. He's smooth with the ladies, at least with the ones who don't recognize the load of crap he's feeding them! Like any teacher, he can deflect questions from the rest of the class while making sure everyone else knows what his opinion is. He's greasy with all his golden bling, and quick to speak up....and like Hallelujah, he has no idea what he's talking about. The upside here is, the class is catching on quick to his bullshit. He's lovin' me man, all it takes is me to roll my eyes and he thinks "affectionately" of his ex-wife! Smart woman, that's all I can say!

The characters just keep poppin' out, here's a few more...

Cliche- she can't let go of her cliches and gets mad when our ideas and discussion doesn't fit snugly in to her little box. She's sweet, just a little stiff.

The Foreigners - one's from Trinidad & Tobago and the other is from Thailand (via New Mexico). You can't understand most of what they are saying, but you love to hear them talk. I get so lost in their accents, that I don't hear their words anyway!

The Mama's - these two are nurturing and sweet and caring, but straightforward and will knock you on your bum if you do wrong! They will take care of you and then make sure you can take care of yourself. Gotta love them.

Super-Gay Straight Guy - he's straight, but you wonder if he's gay about every other minute! He has trendy glasses, but dresses like a dork! Totally flamboyant when he speaks, which is always okay because who doesn't love gay guys! Oh, and he's a nurse...

Super Woman - her kryptonite is her computer, which she is constantly yelling at, but damnit if she doesn't look fabulous! (BTW you are so gay if you read that as fab-U- LOUS!!!!!) She can do it all...just watch! And be prepared to look away and laugh, because she is the only one who thinks she can do it all! Still, who doesn't like super chicks?!?

The Artist - She rarely speaks, is entirely abstract, thinks power point presentations are another outlet for showing off her work, and she just doesn't seem to understand this whole business and education thing.

Last but not least, everyone's favorite....

The Canuck - OK, so we make fun of Canada a lot, well apparently there is a reason for it! This guy is off-topic and is generally lost as an accountant among teachers, nurses, educators, and administrators. The keeper of the money must keep his guard up, defending himself with true geekiness! He's simple and sweet, but when he talks...crap, he's smart?!? I know, the Canadians are always confusing....


Alright kiddies, that's enough! You know you're jealous!

Leaving Florida

My time in Florida was great, but I felt a little guilty leaving. While Miss Jordyn had been quite the easy keeper for most of my stay, you could tell she was beginning to get the hang of the whole crying thing. She is beginning to figure out what those lungs are for and Mommy is beginning to understand just how difficult a newborn can be. Since Daddy went back to work and Mommy couldn't rely on him to help her with Jordyn, Mommy's stress-factor is building. Somehow, Mommy's mom and I managed to schedule our trips at the same time. We enjoyed each other's company, and Mommy enjoyed having us there...but when we both had to leave on the same day, I am sure Mommy was left a little flustered. I felt bad leaving her alone with a two-week old. She has some support in her current hometown, but not the kind of support she would have if she was back in San Diego. I can't imagine having a newborn and not having family around to help out, especially my own mom. Any newborn is a challenge, regardless of actual time spent crying, but a first born has to be a greater shock. Mommy is used to playing part-time mommy to her step-daughter, where the little one goes back to her own mom for every other month. Somewhere along the line Mommy is going to be hit with the hard reality of Jordyn being around for good. Now, don't get me wrong, Mommy can handle it. She just needs to convince herself of this and remind herself of this daily...



It has only been a few days and I am already missing Jordyn and Mommy terribly. I loved our afternoon naps and listening to her little baby noises. Admittedly I don't miss the constant diaper changes and bits of crying, but I don't mind them for a little while... I can't wait to get back and would love to see Jordyn grow. I will definitely miss that....



Here's one last pic of sweet baby J.

Are All Babies This Easy?

I know the answer is no, but still! If all babies were this easy, new mom's wouldn't have much to complain about! Miss Jordyn has had a very good day, a very good few days really. She sleeps well, eats well, and only cries when she's being changed. For example, today we had a nice two hour nap where she was laying on me while I was reading a book and snapping some photos. She'd squirm a bit and flip from one cheek to the other...but that was about it. We even went out for "lunner" at Moe's (think Rubio's but without that baja deliciousness) and mosied around Wal-Mart. I think she slept through it all. Here is today's pic from nap-time. Mel said she loved my laptop so much that she was going to steal it! So I offered a trade, my laptop for her baby. Not surprisingly, she turned me down. Oh well, can't blame a girl for trying, right?

Me & Miss Jordyn, isn't she sweet?

Freezer Burn

So Mommy's "pootie" is on fire but frozen. And we have heard about it all day. I can only imagine that birthing a child through one's "pootie" would be a traumatic experience, for both the mom and the "pootie." After much pushing, pun moderately intended, Mommy finally asked her doctor about why her "pootie" is so bothersome. His first response was "pootie?!?" Mommy more clearly defined her question and proceeded to bust out more vocabulary that he was unfamiliar with, at which point the doctor, Lt. Dr. Hotness, had to stop her to laugh for a bit. We boiled it down to her "pootie" has freezer burn. It hot and its cold, its yes and its no, its black and its white, its wrong and its right....ok not really, but you get the idea. Lt. Dr. Hotness came to the conclusion that he is definitely working for the "New Navy" and that the freezer burn is really just the healing process for having a baby. His reaction was great, he tried to keep breaking it down in medical, proper, terminology, but had trouble keeping a straight face in this discussion. At one point he said, you can still do anything you want to do, except the one thing her told her not to do. Here's Mommy talking about "pooties" and freezer burn, and poor Lt. Dr. Hotness can't even say sex! It made for an awkward few minutes for him, but Mommy certainly enjoyed it!

Oh the things to look forward to when having children! Miss Jordyn is still terribly cute and wonderfully quiet. She enjoyed her trip to the salon with Mommy, but wasn't as tolerable to her trip to see Lt. Dr. Hotness. Maybe she can't appreciate his likeness to Jake Gyllenhal, but the rest of us certainly can!

Restaurant Week

San Diego Restaurant Week involves over 100 restaurants in San Diego showcasing their awesome food in a three-course affordable meal. Last year we headed over to Indigo Grill for one of the most amazing meals I have ever had, also one of the biggest meals ever! I had high expectations for this year...and they were met, for the most part. This time around we tried another Cohn Restaurant, Kemo Sabe. I had the Arizona Roll for the appetizer, which was great! Everything else on the plate was not so good....and fairly confusing. I tried some of the chicken potsticker from a friend's plate, and that was awesome! It wasn't your traditional pot sticker, this one was baked or fried. Totally yummy. For the main course, I had Blackened Satay Chicken Stack. This was pretty much awesome! It is a stack of grilled pineapple, chicken breast, and corn cakes with a side of fruits and 10 spiced grilled plantain. It was a great mix of flavors and spices and pure deliciousness. And dessert....hmmm that was nothing short of amazing! I had a potted brownie with Kahlua ice cream and a chocolate dragon. That's right, a dragon...made of out of white and dark chocolate, you know you want it! All in all, last years was better, but this year will definitely keep me coming back.

On a side note, the Cohn family of restaurants are awesome. They are having a special deal from January 22nd - January 28th, $20.09 for the same menus as restaurant week. I highly recommend it, so check it out!

Meeting Miss Jordyn

My best friend is now a Mommy and I finally made it out to Florida to see both Mommy and her new baby girl, Jordyn. She is only 10 days old, so she is still tiny and cute as a button! Since this is the first one of my friends/family where I can be around for the newborn days and see Jordyn gro from the very beginning, it has been quite an experience. For example, fresh of the red-eye flight from San Diego to Jacksonville, we bundled up and headed over the the Naval hospital to take a class on baby massage. After that and some nursing in the lobby, its home for more nursing and tons of diaper changes. Luckily, Jordyn is prety quiet and sleeps most of the time! Here's the first of many pictues. I'll be here for a week and I am sure there will be several more bloggable moments. Stay tuned....

The New Job

I’ve known pretty much from the beginning that my new job was a positive step in the right direction. I am happy to report that I have confirmed this suspicion! I do miss select people at my old gig, and am pretty sure an ex-coworker was in line behind me at Subway today… But the new crew is awesome. It makes all the difference in the world to work with people you like. My boss rocks and seems true to her word. My coworkers and I have a lot in common and are equally productive and chatty. I think I’ve found a new (good) home here. Yay!

Recipe Resolution

One of my New Year’s resolutions was to try one new recipe a week. Like most people, it is still early enough in the game (aka year), that I am still true to my resolutions. Proactive in fact! Knowing that I would be out of town for a little bit, I tried two new recipes this week. Ok, really Saturday Morning and I tried two new recipes this week, seeing as how she really did the work for the second recipe. Along the way she also had the idea to document the progress of cooking with a picture every week. Sort of proof of accomplishment if you will. This week’s recipes were for Chicken Rolled with Ham and Provolone and Stuffed Mushrooms.

By the way, I had a bit of a rude awakening a few months back. I absolutely love the stuffed mushrooms at Olive Garden! I have been eating them for years, almost a decade really! So imagine my surprise when this fish-allergic, shell-fish despising, bottom-crawler resistant, picky eater finds out that there are CLAMS in the stuffed mushrooms!!! Eeeeeeewwwww!!!! I can no longer enjoy that dish, and have serious gag reflex when reflecting on how many I have had over the years! I am traumatized. If you’ll note, the recipe above DOES NOT include clams! Although it does taste nice with the lemon and butter reduction from the Chicken dish…

Here are the recipes and proof of completion....

Garlic Stuffed Mushroom
Great Food, Great Beer The Anheuser Busch Cookbook
2 Heads garlic, cloves separated and peeled.
1 Cup heavy cream
1 Cup panko (Japanese bread crumbs) or plain dried bread crumbs
1 Teaspoon salt
24 Large button or cremini mushrooms, stemmed
2 Teaspoons olive oil
¼ Teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

1. In a small saucepan, combine the garlic and cream over low heat. Slowly cook until the garlic is soft enough to mash with a spoon, about 45 minutes. (The cream will be reduced and thick). Remove from the heat and mash the garlic into the cream with a fork, making a rough puree. Stir in the Panko and salt, mixing thoroughly.
2. Preheat the oven to 450 degrees. Lay the mushroom caps, top side down, on a lightly oiled baking sheet. Brush the edges with olive oil and fill the centers with the garlic mixture.
3. Bake until starting to brown, about 15 minutes. Remove from the oven and let stand for 5 to 10 minutes. Transfer the mushrooms to plates or a platter, discarding any released liquid. Sprinkle with pepper and serve.
Makes 4-6 servings


Chicken Roll-Ups with Ham and Provolone
Reader’s Digest – Great Chicken Dishes Cookbook

4 Skinless, boneless chicken breast halves, pounded to ¼ inch thickness
½ Teaspoon salt
¼ Pound thinly sliced Virginia ham
2 Ounces thinly sliced provolone cheese
12 Large fresh basil leaves
1 Tablespoon olive oil
½ Cup chicken broth
2 Tablespoons fresh lemon juice
1 Tablespoon unsalted butter, cut up

1. Sprinkle chicken with salt. Place chicken breasts smooth-side down. Place ham on top of chicken. Top with provolone and basil leaves. Starting at short end, roll each chicken breast up and secure with toothpicks.
2. In large skillet, heat oil over medium-low heat. Add chicken roll-ups and sauté, turning chicken as it cooks, 10 minutes or until golden.
3. Add broth to pan, cover and cook, turning chicken over, 5-7 minutes or until cooked through. Transfer chicken to cutting board and slice crosswise into ½ inch slices. Transfer to dinner plates.
4. Add lemon juice and butter to pan and swirl over very low heat until creamy. Spoon over chicken.
Makes 4 servings